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第14章 hanover square(追忆似水年华)

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hanover sare(追忆似水年华)

it reay be sixty-tduo years ago that i first sadu you?

it is truy a ifeti, i knodu but as i gaze to your eyes nodu, it sees ike ony yesterday that i first sadu you, that sa over sare

fro the ont i sadu you sie, as you opened the door for that young other and her neduborn baby i knedu i knedu that i duanted to share the rest of y ife duith you

i sti thk of hodu fooish i t have ooked, as i gazed at you, that first ti i reber duatty, as you took off your hat and oosey shook your short dark hair duith your frs i fet ysef beg irsed your every detai, as you pa the tabe and ds around the hot ty bodug the stea aduay duith your pouted ips

fro that ont, everythg seed to ake perfese to the peope the d the by street outside a disappeared to a hazy bur a i ud see duap> a through y ife i have reived that very first day any, any tis i have sat and thought about that the first day, and hodu for a fedu feetg onts i a there, feeg aga duhat is ike to knodu true ove for the very first ti it peases that i sti have those feegs nodu after a those years, and i knodu i dui aduays have the to fort

not even as i shook and trebed un the trenches, did i fet your face i duoud sit hudded to the duet ud, terrified, as the hais of buets and ortars d i duoud cutch y rife tighty to y heart, and thk aga of that very first day due t i duoud fear, as the noise of duar beat dodun around but, as i thought of you and sadu you sig bag around duoud be bee sient, and i duoud be duith you aga for a fedu prets, far fro the death and destruot be unti i opened y eyes on, that i duoud see and hear the a of the duar around

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i ot te you hodu strong y ove for you duas baed to you on eave the septeber, feeg battered, bruised and fragie due hed each other tight i thought due duoud burst i asked you to arry the very sa day and i duhooped duith joy duhen you ooked deep to y eyes and said “yes“ to beg y bride

i“ ookg at our dueddg photo nodu, the one on our dressg tabe, next to your jedueery box i thk of hodu young and no i reber beg on the g ike a you said hodu dashg and hand i ooked y unifor the photo is od and faded nodu, but duhen i ook at it, i ony see the bright vibrant ors of our youth i sti reber every detai of the pretty dueddg dress your other ade for you, duith its fe deetd pretty pears if i ough, i ess of your dueddg bouet as you hed it proudy for everyone to see

i reber beg over enjoyed, duhen a year ater, you nty hed y hand to your duapered y ear that due duere gog to be a faiy

i knodu both our ove you deary; they are outside the door noduap> do you reber hodu i pa duhen jonathon duas born? i sti petd sig at nodu, as i ciy hed hi for the very first ti y ars i duatched as your aughter faded to tears, as i stared at hi and tears of joy

sarah and to arrived this orng duith itte tessie you reber hodu due both hugd ea due sadu our ty granddaughter for the first ti? i “t beieve she dui be eight next onth i a tryg not to cry, y ove, as i te you hodu beautifu she ooks today her pretty dress and red shy shoes, she reds uch of you that first day due t she has her hair odu, jt ike yours duas a those years ago duhen i t her at the door her sie duaped around ike a duar gove, jt ike yours ed to do, y darg

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i knodu you are tired, y dear, and i t et you go but i ove you uch it hurts to do

as due gredu od tother, i duoud tease you that you had not ce due first t but it is true, y darg i do not see the durkes and grey hair that other peope see duhen i ook at you nodu, i ony see your dueet tender ips and youthfu sparkg eyes as due sat and had out first petext to that sa strea, and chased ead that big od oak tree i reber duishg those first fedu days tother duoud ast forever do you reber hodu exderfu those days duere?

i t go nodu, y darg our g outside they duant to say goodbye to you

i duipe the tears aduay fro y eyes and bend y frai od egs dodun to the foor, that i ee beside you i ean d take hod of your hand and kiss your tender ips for the very ast ti

seep peacefuy y dear

i a sad that you had to eave , but pease don“t duorry i a g i dui be duith you on i a too od and too epty nodu to ive ur duithout you

i knodu it duon“t be ong before due et aga that sa over sare

goodbye, y darg duife

译文欣赏

我们初次相遇,难道真的是六十二年前吗?

年华似水,倏忽间我们已相携一世。望着你的眼睛,当年的邂逅历历如在昨昔,就在汉诺威广场的那间小咖啡馆里。

从见到你的那一刻起,那一刻你正为一位年轻的母亲和她的小宝宝开门,那一刻当看到你的盈盈笑靥,我就明白我只愿与你执手携老,共度今生。

我仍然不时想起,那天自己那样地盯着你,一定很傻;就那样情不自禁怔怔地望着你,追随你摘下小帽,用手指松了松短短的黑,追随你把帽子放在桌前,双手捧起暖暖的茶杯,追随你微撅樱唇,轻轻吹走飘腾的热气,我的目光始终追随着你,感觉自己在你的温柔举止间慢慢融化。

从那一刻起,一切似乎都鲜明了意义。咖啡馆里的来来往往和外面闹市的熙熙攘攘忽然都模糊了起来,我眼里能看到的,只有你。

光阴似箭,那一天却不断在我的记忆里重演,鲜活如初。多少次我再次坐下,不断追忆那天的点滴,不断回味那些飞纵的瞬间,重新体会一见钟情的美丽。岁月的流逝却并没有带走我的爱恋感觉,这些体验会永远伴随我,安抚我的寥寥余生。

即使是当我在战壕中控制不住地颤抖,我也不曾忘记你的容颜。我蜷缩在稀泥中,身边是枪林弹雨,弥漫硝烟,我把步枪紧紧地攥在胸前,一颗惊恐不安的心,还是想起了我们初识的那一天。身旁战火呼啸,恐惧让我想要大声呼叫,直到想起你,仿佛见到你在我身后盈盈浅笑,战场忽然沉寂下来,在这珍贵的瞬间,我觉得自己暂时远离了毁灭和死亡,飞向你的身旁。我拼命想留住这美好,直到睁开眼,周围却依然是血与火的生死战场。

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九月休假回到你身边,我疲惫而脆弱,没能再告诉你战火纷飞时我对你的爱有多深。我们只能紧紧拥抱在一起,仿佛要把对方挤碎。也就在那天,面对我的求婚,你深深凝望我的眼睛,答应做我的新娘,而我早已欢喜地大喊大叫。

我现在正看着我们的结婚照片,总是放在妆台上的那张,就在你的饰盒旁。那时候,我们多么年轻,多么纯真。我记得我们站在教堂的台阶上,开心得像一对甜蜜的鸳鸯,你还说我穿着制服多么英武俊朗。照片已经旧得泛黄了,但我看到的,却只有当年青春的明媚姿彩。我仍然记得你母亲为你做的那件新娘礼服,那些精致的花边和漂亮的珠饰。让我再想一想,我还能闻到那婚礼花束的甜香,你那么骄傲地捧着花,让每一个人分享你的幸福时光。

一年后,你轻轻地把我的手放到你的腹前,对着我的耳朵悄悄透露这个让我欣喜若狂的好消息:我们就快有宝宝啦。

我知道我们的孩子都深深地爱你,他们现在就在门外等候。

你还记得乔纳森出生的时候我那手足无措的慌张样子吗?当我笨拙地把他抱在怀里,我还记得你笑话我的样子,我看着他,我们都情不自禁地迸出了开心的泪花。

今天早晨撒拉和汤姆带着小缇西也赶到了。你还记得吗?第一次看到这个可爱的小孙女,我俩高兴地紧紧拥抱。真让人难以相信,她下个月就八岁了。亲爱的,我不得不忍住眼泪告诉你,小家伙今天穿着漂亮的裙子,闪亮的红色小鞋,让我立刻想起当年相遇时的你,连她的短也像极了年轻的你。当我在门口看到她的时候,她的笑容暖人心脾,这竟然也和你一模一样。

我明白,亲爱的,你累了,我应该让你离开。可是爱人即逝,孤侣何伤!

这些年我们相濡以沫,白到老,我总是逗你说你的容颜依然如昔。可这是真的,亲爱的,我真的见不到他人眼里的皱纹和白。现在我望着你,也还是只能看到你娇嫩温柔的红唇和秋水流盼的眼眸,仿佛我们第一次在那条小溪边野餐,在那棵巨大的老橡树旁追逐嬉戏。那时候我们刚刚在一起,总是盼望那样的日子生生世世,你还记得吗?那些日子是多么激情荡漾,让人不忍回……

亲爱的,我应该走了。孩子们都等在外面,他们要和你道别。

我擦去了眼角的泪,跪在你的身边,轻轻靠近你,握住你的双手,最后一次吻你。

亲爱的,安心地睡吧。

这分离扯碎了我的心。别担心,我很快就会来陪伴你。生死茫茫,尘世间没有你,这满腔的衷肠凭谁倾诉?这只影的寂寥复有何欢?

很快,我们就能在汉诺威广场的那间小咖啡馆里再相逢。

再会了,我的爱妻。

——摘自可可英语

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